Hearing and being heard

This week, Rabbi Miriam Lorie joined BBC Radio 2's Pause for Thought.

Listen here

They say that a shoemaker’s children go barefoot, but my lovely mum is an optometrist, and she did make sure to test my, my brother and sister’s eyes as we were growing up. And Scott, it’s confession time, because I was not a good patient. 

When mum said "is it better 1 or 2?” I would say “3”. And she had one of those swivelly office chairs with a lever for adjusting the height that was exactly at my foot level as I sat on the patient’s chair. So I may, on one occasion or five, have nudged the lever, sending mum’s optometrist chair plummeting down a few inches. 

Terrible behaviour, certainly not befitting of the Jewish laws I learnt as I grew older about the respect due to our parents. But mum was always so good natured about it. She’s an amazing mum, and a dedicated optometrist, and I want to pay tribute to her today, because she has just retired, after nearly 40 years in practice. 

Mum is deeply modest, and doesn’t know this is coming, so she’ll be listening at home, face in her hands, probably crying. But mum, I want you to know that you have meant so much to the hundreds of patients you’ve taken care of. 

You’ve not only helped their vision, but you’ve listened to their problems and been a friend to them, even if your appointments are double or triple the length the NHS recommends. You’ve taken your profession above and beyond. 

There’s actually an eyesight related line in the Ethics of the Fathers, a book of Jewish wisdom, which says:

“Know what there is above you: an eye that sees, an ear that hears”.

God is the ultimate deep listener with great vision, and I love how eyesight and listening come together in this line. 

Because good vision isn’t just physiological - not just about getting the right glasses or contact lenses. It’s about hearing and being heard. And this, mum, is exactly what you’ve helped your patients with. And if I’ve matured at all from the cheeky little prankster whose eyes you tested as a child, then that, mum, is thanks to you too.